Taking the Risk to Let Go
2011
Three years ago, I “broke up” with my long-term, dedicated group of massage clients. I also bid adieu to my yoga mamas and stopped teaching my successful, fun and rewarding Prenatal Yoga classes.
It was challenging letting go, completing relationships and ending a cycle. I’d been the family massage therapist since beginning a Reflexology apprenticeship at the age of five, followed two decades later with a professional practice. Massaging was sentimental and it was what I “did.”
My massage clients taught me how to listen to the body and it’s seemingly silent messages. The yoga mamas reinforced a deep appreciation for the initiation of childbirth and motherhood. I was going to miss these people and that brought on a discomfort which led to procrastinating the inevitable ~ moving on and evolving.
That said, more challenging to deal with was the burnout I started to experience years prior, combined with the fear, doubt and resistance associated with eliminating core components of my business. Who would I be? What would I do? How would I create income?
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin
One day, while meditating in a yoga class, my inner voice spoke loud and clear – “Stop trying to satisfy your love of and gifts for sharing dance, through massaging and teaching yoga. Your direct channel to Spirit and joy is through dance.” The message was real and unmistakable.
I listened to my intuition – internal truth messenger – and took courageous steps towards living my truth. Shortly thereafter, I focused on developing my transformational and fun movement practice, Bhakti Boogie®, became a Hoopnotica Master Hoop Dance Instructor, traveled to four countries to teach hula hooping to adults, and was featured as a lead instructor and choreographer in the Marisa Tomei hoopBody DVD.
I had no idea at the time that letting go was going to rapidly usher in so much growth and fulfillment in my professional life. The experience revealed to me that when you’re on purpose, aligned and authentic, life showers its’ abundance.
I Cheated On My Fears.
Broke Up With My Doubts.
Got Engaged With My Faith.
Now, im marrying my dreams.
Anon
Looking back, I see that this adult experience of choosing to let go strengthened currents of courage and trust in my being. Currents which supported me this year in ending my six year marriage, moving my daughter and I across the country, and reducing my work load with a long term client. (You can see that I’m one for big transformations.)
To say the least, 2011, was a year of immense change.
As such, I’m currently fascinated with death and the petit morts – little deaths and ironically the French word for “orgasm” – that happen each moment. Strolling down the beach and occasionally looking back to observe the distance traveled, has become a practice. Looking at what is gained through the space created by what is released, has become a contemplation.
Since moving to California this August…
- I have found community and immense beauty in the landscape of the central coastline.
- My daughter and I live in a gorgeous home with a view of the Pacific Ocean meeting the sky. We cherish even more the relationships with friends and family back east.
- My coaching business has grown and I’m thrilled to offer a Bhakti Boogie® ~ Dance Meditation Retreat in Bali, Indonesia this March.
- My first HoopYogini™ DVD is in post-production.
- The beautiful website that I’ve dreamed of has been birthed.
- My first blog post (you’re reading it), a cathartic expression of truth, has been published
We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
Joseph Campbell
Thank you for reading and witnessing this journey. Life is constantly unfolding and more deliciousness will be revealed.
In this season of reflection and the closing of another year, I know there are many releases and changes for you to acknowledge and process. Today, now, comment below and tell me what you’ve let go of and what that spaciousness has created in your life. What are you letting go of now to allow space for your truth and dreams to shine?
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There are several practices that boost my courage, soothe my heart and help me integrate change. I want to share them with you. Next week, I’ll provide you with D.A.N.C.E – Daily Actions Ensuring Conscious Evolution tips that helped me initiate and navigate consciously through some of the change mentioned above. Sign up for my newsletter to ensure that you’ll receive the post. To help you connect to your intuition – internal truth messenger – you’ll also receive a FREE download of my Awaken Seated Meditation audio as a member of my newsletter community.
Are you ready to move through resistance and into the life of your dreams? I’m your coach. Receive Collaborative GuiD.A.N.C.E & Coaching Sessions to identify and speak the BIG Dream & CORE Vision that you wish to be true for you and your life.
Please comment below, share this post and share the love as I’m letting go of fear to allow for vulnerability and connection. Dancing Forward…
36 comments
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Goddess! Inspiring~ Awesome~ Authentic share! Thank you for being willing to be exposed and vulnerable to live your hearts bliss! You give us permission to do the same! Keep on growing towards the light! It is radiating eternally! Many blessings on the sacred adventure! Be blessed, and may 2012 bring your hearts desire manifest!
Thank you Heidi! Our light inspires others to shine! We’re getting brighter! Dancing Forward…Continued Blessings!
That really capretus the spirit of it. Thanks for posting.
Thank you all for reading, witnessing this journey and sharing your thoughts!!!
Congratulations on your starting something new. The blog is beautiful.
Woendrful explanation of facts available here.
Aware, intentional, honest and inspirational. Such bravery! I’m so happy for you J~ Cheers!
Gosh Jocelyn! Where do i begin?! First of all big congrats on the manifestation of such a beautiful site, it really is a wonderful representation of your spirit
Your story soothes my heart as i too broke up from my 7 year marriage and moved back from Thailand to the UK in September this year. For too long i put myself to one side and lived somebody elses dream, way too afraid to let go, shame and a sense of failure filled my very being, however i became seriously ill this year and at that point i realized how out of alignment i actually was, a massive wake up call, i decided to listen to the signs my body and spirit were shouting at me and made my move.
3 months on and i am still wading through the consequences of my decision but i am filled once again with hope and i am returning to dance in 2012, willing to try anything that appeals to get my creative juices flowing again, 5 Rhythms, Belly Dance, Hoop Dance, Nia…the list goes on. This is a vital part of who i am, the little girl who would dance at the drop of a hat, perform with no inhibitions and love openly and freely.
Thank you for being YOU. Your light shines so brightly.
XXXXXX
Ma belle Jocelyn, thank you for sharing your experience and transformation! So many things you shared resonate deeply with me, as I also did “break up” or let go of commitments I could no longer continue (burnout) to let room for new things to enter my life .. having no idea of what it could be. It takes a lot of courage to do such a thing. Thank you for giving more courage to follow my inner voice and put forth the intentions and actions to create something new
Have a wonderful 2012! bisouxx
Jocelyn –
I remember the days of your busy massage and yoga practice. You were an inspiration to your clients then and I’m so happy to see you’re living the life to inspire now. I have no fears for you. You’re a guiding light – it can only lead you and others to happiness and fulfillment! Best wishes for you always!
Sarah, I’m blushing! Thank you!!! And, congratulations on your expanded family. You look very happy. Continued blessings to you and yours!
Dearest Jocelyn,
You are a light, an inspiration and a positive influence to the dancing community. Thank you. We appreciate you, your genuine love for life and over-flowing generosity that you share through your tuned thoughts, words and actions. A true leader of example. Im so thankful that there are women to stand with the courage to announce their declaration of independance!!
I knew you were beautiful before I ever met you at Hoop Camp. So thrilled to see your journey! You are an inspiration for positive change!
We love you so
Lacey, I don’t think words will describe how your comment made me feel. I’m making sure this goes into my confidence journal. Thank you for fueling the fire! LOVE!
At last! Someone who understands! Thanks for pstoing!
Inspiring to hear from you as always~
Congrates Joycelyn, you are a POWER HOUSE of talent and inspiration to so many!!! I too have let go of allot of old limiting beliefs that really held me back in allot of things…but not no more!!! so lets create together!!
I want to live in a ‘spiritual neighborhood’. A place where caring and sharing, loving and holiness bless each day. I want to have more ‘fun’ and play more and dance AND HOOP !!!, and sing and delight in this most awesome garden of our Creator’s Creation.
All that we have is given unto us by Grace. Let us embrace and give thanks. I want to hear mo…re laughter, joy-us song, giggles, prayer and praise..Not just on Sabbath and holydays..But everyday. I want to hold the puppies, play and cavort with the children, passion with my peers and compassion with my elders. I want to give and receive more healing touch and affection. I want to help tend the gardens that bring forth the food, that nurture our humanity in awareness of Divinity.
I want to share more silent spaces with myself and others…listening..caring..Loving..Sharing. Away from a medicated society…embracing a meditative extended family. Away from fear based encounter..Towards loving communion. Far away from scarcity mentality…living in infinite abundance and holy love. Yes yes..We are blessed..Blessed. Communion – come union together.
“My dreams of perfection are the bridges that carry me into the realm of pure ideas”
(Yogananda)
IN LOVE AND LIGHT..Donna~The HoopGoddess
”Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand – relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it. Abraham Hicks
”Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand – relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it.” Abraham Hicks
Donna, you are inspiring and all plus more of what you expressed above IS manifesting NOW. You are in your Vortex and it’s so beautiful to observe.
Let us allow and receive all the beauty, love, bliss, play, health and abundance that you U n I verse has to share with us!
I hope to see you at my Bhakti Boogie Retreat. Bhakti means to Offer Up. Boogie means to Get Down. You get it!
Love you Lady!!!
http://jocelyngordon.com/events/bali-bhakti-boogie%C2%AE-march-2012/
Jocelyn, this post could not have come at a better time! What a wonderful way to usher in the new year! Thank you so much for sharing. I’m so happy for you and wish you many more blessings to come! Recently I’ve let go of trying to fix a situation that seemed out of control. Once I let go of that “control”, it fixed itself! It’s amazing how the universe answers when you let go and invite space! I plan to be more conscience and listen to my inner voice and let go of the fear to take risks in order to create new space in my life.
Boneza, so great to hear from you! Letting go of control. That’s a good one. I’m being humbled too in that area!
Hey love,
So happy I read your journey and see where it has taken you. What a transformative year for sure! Lots of closings, as tough as they are, lead to so many amazing openings for you! Love it!
I too took the plunge to leave a job that was so dissatisfying that it was effecting my health and well being. I was about to leave it once and then got scared and jumped back to it. Then was offered a position as a Training Manager. I was already underpaid for doing work as a trainer (software company for real estate agents doing foreclosures and making training programs and videos for them as well as online training through web conferences). Asked for the raise to one of the owners of the company and never got it. Just got a title and along with that more and more stressful amounts of work, large amounts of exhaustion, no time to eat and was trying to do my own hoop business in my area. One day I just “lost it” on the owner. My losing it is pretty calm cool and collected and probably makes it a bit more harsher because of that. Decided I was leaving and that was it. I couldn’t even go in for two days after my losing it. I new I had to make a decision for me. Sat and cried in the office of the owner and said I just couldn’t sacrifice me anymore. Pulled out some of my IRA money and left after two weeks. After 6 months out of it, I know I will never go back to a situation like that again. I am still learning the balance of relaxing, slowing down for me and taking care of myself. I am doing things I really want to do because they are from my heart! That makes me feel more whole and loved by me! Been doing hoop classes, selling hoops, crafting faery wings and lots of my artwork. I even revived my art blog that I hadn’t posted in anything in over a year (http://creativedeviation.blogspot.com/). Even been overcoming my fear of heights and taking aerial classes. I am sooo much happier after taking the leap. In so many ways I am very grateful I was pushed to the edge by my old company and old life to move into this new life I am creating. It just feel better not saying there aren’t moments but still! We’ll see where it goes for sure!
Sending love your way!!
XOXO
Wow Soolah, I really felt your discomfort through your share AND your relief to have moved out of that unhealthy work environment. You definitely pushed your edge and for that I know you have received so many rewards especially health and well-being. Kudos for you for “spinning out” and stepping forward. Congratulations on the expansion of your hoop business and revival of your creativity. Your background in developing online training programming is a viable and profitable skill. Mix it up with your hoop business and you have guaranteed success. Enjoy all the good, beauty and creativity that’s coming your way. Exciting!
Beautiful Jocelyn,
Thank you for sharing your journey….and so beautifully written and expressed.
I am so grateful to know you and to have you as my graceful warrior sister dancing this path.
I am letting go of the pressure i put on myself to do it all and more.
I am trusting the perfect people are coming to assist us creating and expanding our visions and dreams here.
I am letting go of having to be perfect.
I am learning the artful dance of balance
I am remembering to take time for me to commune with nature and spirit.
besos from the jungle…..
Dearest Sofiah, we are kin on many levels. Progress runs deep in my dreams, blood, psyche…. I too intend to r e l a x, allow and trust. On Jan 1, I picked the following Angel Card:
TRUST
the great force of the Universe.
Sofiah, you are perfectly inspirational through your presence and authenticity.
My life has been touched and improved by your beautiful Dance of Life.
Thank you!
What an Goddess you are Jocelyn! May you serve as tan inspiration for those of us who have a created a prison constructed of our comforts that we have now outgrown so that we can break free and become authentic speakers of truth and follow our true dharma. Namaste.
And so it is!!!
That inishgt’s just what I’ve been looking for. Thanks!
Talk about divine timing! Reading this post was confirmation for me in many ways. Thanks for sharing your spirit and strength. Namaste sistah ; )
Namaste Trina! It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I look forward to learning more about your journey! Please consider dancing with us in Bali March 10 – 16, 2012 for my Bhakti Boogie® ~ Dance Meditation retreat with Dharma DJ, Adam Dreisler.
Heck yeah bay-bee keep them ciomng!
jg, what a beautiful piece of your evolution.
everything is such gorgeous self expression!
feeling the love, loving the light.
with you along the path of continuation.
xoxo
Lovely Natasha, I am in deep appreciation of your friendship.
Thank you.
Thanks for helipng me to see things in a different light.
Thanks for the lovely article.If you haven’t already, you should look into Nia. I bet it would be a great match for you and where you are on your journey.
Hi Jason! Thank you for your comment! I have experienced NIA. They have a very thorough format which allows for a beautifully expressive experience. Happy New Now!
Appreciation for this ifnomartoin is over 9000-thank you!
I believe this website contains some very wonderful info for everyone. “The human spirit needs to accomplish, to achieve, to triumph to be happy.” by Ben Stein.